Prayers & Blessings: A Preborn Prodigy Review

Disclaimer: I received a FREE copy of this product through the HOMESCHOOL REVIEW CREW in exchange for my honest review. I was not required to write a positive review nor was I compensated in any other way.

Out of my three pregnancies, my daughter's is my favorite because I used self-hypnosis before and during labor.  It might sound a little kooky, but the powerful messages I learned to tell myself transformed my state of mind all the way through her delivery.  Needless to say, I believe in the power of positive messages sent to our subconscious mind.  Today's review is a from a company that believes the same thing.  Preborn Prodigy desires to transform lives with God's word through these powerful albums of music.  

What We Received:
We received three separate, individually packaged CDs:

• Prayers and Blessings for the Unborn Child -
• Prayers and Blessings Newborn to 99
• Math Prodigy

How It Works:

Positive messages like these aren't required to be completely understood or comprehended at first or even every setting.  As in the unborn child especially, a working knowledge of the truths taught here isn't expected.  Instead, these ideas are designed to enter our subconscious first to build up our emotional health and strength. Depending on your age and level of understanding, the truths eventually become something you can verbalize as you listen to it over time.  In the case of the Unborn Child and Newborn to 99, truths from the Bible - including psalms, prayers, encouragements - are set to peaceful, soothing music.  The Math prodigy album sets math facts and concepts to similarly relaxing music through a worldview that honors a Creator. 

How We Used It:

My children are 9, 6 and 3 so the Prayers and Blessings for the Unborn Child didn't apply to any of them directly.  When I listened to it though, most of it was true for them regardless of in the womb or not! Still, we primarily listened to Prayers and Blessings Newborn to 99 and Math Prodigy. We enjoyed them most during school time because that's when we are quiet and the stereo is nearby.  Since we received them in the mail, the world has become incredibly uncertain due to the current 'pandemic' and the calming truths have been incredibly appropriate. The Math prodigy album presents a wide variety of information so it's good for all of my kids' age levels and for learning any time!  All albums are great for in the car when you need everyone to calm down or even go to sleep on a long trip.

Any of these would be wonderful gifts to new mothers, but the Unborn Child album could be a powerful blessing to a pregnant woman in all kinds of circumstances.  Whether they are in a stable environment or in complicated waters, this could be a shroud of safety and protection for both her and the new child.  From reading up on the company, I know these albums are a ministry more than a business.  As the truths are straight from scripture, this gift could be planting the seeds of salvation in the heart of a parent or child.  It's a beautiful thing!

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The Review Crew consists of homeschool families at all stages of life! Read more reviews to get a better idea of how this product worked for different ages!

The Treasure in a Closet

Standing in the kids' closet, hanging up size 3T dress shirts belonging to my last little boy, it suddenly sunk in.  In Luke 2:19 it says that she (Mary) treasured all these things in her heart, talking about her son, Jesus.  I know what it means - I'm a mother and a Bible student so I've read it several times before.  But standing in front of a collection of clothes including a few kept from when his big brother was that size, I suddenly treasured these things in my heart in a way I had never experienced before.  Snapshots of memories flashed through my mind and a strange comfort came over me because I had been there for every one.  I was a witness to these three babies' lives in a way that no other human was able to be.  I was there.  There's no assurance of the next 10 years, but for these past I am so thankful I was able to be there.

Being a mother is hard. Being a stay at home mom plus a homeschooling one can be lonely, despite constantly being surrounded by people.  It's a 24/7 job that is full of thankless tasks and revolving doors of work.  I'm pretty strong-willed and I'm married to a really strong-minded guy, so I want to do all the things great! But truth be told, it's wearisome some days, especially with an almost 3 year old who goes about destroying at the speed of lightening. I've accepted the hardness of it for a while, but keeping the joy in it is something I fail at quite a bit.  As a newlywed, the ideas of homemaking were so exciting and fulfilling, but as usual real life is just harder than I thought it would be.  But standing in a closet today, deeply aware of how soon it will pass by, I was just so thankful that I was given the best seat in the house.

This moment in life - where my 9 year old son wears bigger shoes than I, my 6 year old daughter having to learn how to manicure her strength of will with gentleness, and my baby full of joy and magic that I know will start to change soon - is being cast to a backdrop of unrest in our country and mountains of stress and pain that we, as their parents, are working to shield them from as best we can.  We are still trying to learn how to be whole and healthy, despite life bearing down hard.  In this age of adulthood, where people disappoint and hurt us, it's our job to process it and filter it with God's will in mind and provide these growing souls strength and wisdom to grow in.  I remember thinking once when I was much younger how easy I thought it would be to avoid being a stumbling block to one of these little ones. Oh, how youth can deceive.  One of my biggest fears now is that my pain or foolishness will cause my little ones to stumble.

Living through life's changes is complicated and I don't know what I'm doing most of the time.  Today, I'm just thankful for all the treasured giggles and hugs and love that I have the privilege of soaking up.

Out of Context: The Importance of Breaks

Sometimes we can get so entrenched in our life that we lose the proper context or perspective we should be living in.  From a designated quiet time where everyone reads to a romantic getaway for a couple of weeks, we all need to prioritize breaks in our life.  It’s easy to make excuses because, well, life.  There could be several reasons why temporarily changing your normal seems out of reach.  Money, babysitters, work requirements, school requirements, and responsibilities of all kinds absolutely make it challenging, but no matter what the obstacle is, finding a way is worth it.  Teaching our children and future generations the importance of balancing work and rest is worth it.     

Anxiety, depression and suicide seem to be at an all time high.  Kids and teenagers are    mountains of pressure (and not handling it well) despite our culture of convenience.  The internet and social media have created problems we weren’t really ready for.  Well-meaning parents everywhere are looking for an easy solution, but avoiding lifestyle changes like the plague.  Just like the person who complains about weight-gain, but continues a fast food, lethargic way of life, nothing will change for the better unless you insist upon it.  Taking breaks – physical, emotional, and spiritual – gives life to our motivation and purpose.  Stopping the regular flow of life allows us to see it differently, often more clearly.  Distance away from the people in your life, even just 20 feet for an hour’s time can spark joy and clarity.

Kids, like adults, have varying rhythms and paces.  Now that my 3^rd baby is almost 3, I can say with conviction that every kid is sooooo different and that includes what kind of distance and downtime they require for optimal mental health.  Knowing them and how they really function best takes time and study, but it’s the only way we can truly give them these tools in the future. 

After a very eventful Winter Break, I learned a few things about breaks.

You don’t know what life would be like with less until you’ve tried it.  Less obligations, less outings, less distractions, less busy.  Until soccer season is over or that side job goes on hiatus, you can’t really understand what’s important to you or how your family might function (better).

The complaints you have about your job/family/house/life are often just the result of crankiness.  When we’re hungry/tired/sick/stressed/overstimulated/neglected everything feels worse.  Taking a time out to remedy one or more of those needs can eliminate the bulk of those complaints very quickly.  Like a child who needs a nap, we have a tendency to overextend and get shocked at our inability to live life calmly.

A break is worth just as much whether it’s on a tropical beach somewhere or on your back porch with the kids banned inside.  Every season of life has its limits and struggles, but breaks are still needed.  If you can afford to take a vacation – DO IT! If you have amazing babysitters – TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THEM!  If you have the chance to not commit to as much – DON’T FEEL GUILTY!  If you are bound up right now in life, then make the porch or the bathroom this amazing space where no one is allowed to interrupt for 15 minutes!

Honor those in your family by teaching them the value of breaks.

The Children We Despise

There is a trend with young mothers right now who scoff and resist when their elders suggest they are going to miss this season of life.  For the most part, all parties are well-meaning and the argument (if you'd even call it that) doesn't need to be rehashed.  However, it highlights something we don't talk about.

There are children or times in our children's lives that we find ourselves despising these precious gifts.  It's not that we hate children or wish them harm, but feelings of resentment or harsh criticism repeatedly bubble to the top.  We don't like it and in some cases would NEVER admit it (because that would mean being a monster who didn't deserve to have children, right?), but in the silence of our closets when deciding on which piece of clothing you hate the least that day, you can't deny the volcano ready to erupt around this child/these children.

Sometimes it is a personality conflict - sometimes those precious daughters are just. like. YOU.  Other times it's a simple problem of more energy going out than coming in and anyone needing anything from you becomes your enemy.  Other times a mom just can't seem to make sense of this little boy who is trying to find his way to manhood.  The reasons can be as complex and unique as the children and may not really matter all that much at the end of the day.

The most important thing to remember when you find yourself struggling to love these little souls the way Jesus does is that these feelings are simply a signal - a notification, if you will.  This bubbling eruption is telling you that you need care in some way.  Sure, it is also a sign that your child needs care too, but that won't happen adequately until your attitude and head space is right. We are just human and parenting is a lot in this fast-forward, social-media perfect culture.  If you aren't feeding your soul and keeping your perspective healthy on a regular basis, then of course overwhelming feelings of resentment are likely to set up shop in our hearts.

When you're stuck in a cycle of exasperation, remember this.  We all respond better when we feel safe, heard and cared for.  That includes you!  Do you have a safe space to talk when you need it?  Are you making more healthy choices than not on a regular basis?  Are you spending enough time outdoors, something that is super important to mental health?  If your answer is no to all three, you need to do something about it!  I read a quote recently about the quality of the fruit depending on the health of the tree.  As a parent, you are life-giving tree and if you are crumbling you are likely to sour those around you.  Do you know a parent who is desperate need of care?  Help them out with a free night of babysitting or going on an evening walk.  Something to help us get our heads on straight so that we don't turn into volcanoes! 

How to Vacation with Young Kids and Not Lose Your Mind

In case you didn't know this already, vacationing with kids is an entirely different experience than without kids.  At best it's just really different.  At worst, it's REALLY hard to consider it a vacation.  So much so that many families abstain altogether.  You see, location doesn't change how much you have to do for a child.  So, changing diapers and feeding has to happen whether you are at home or in a hotel of luxury on the other side of the world.  Of course, finances, locations, and opportunities will differ, but I have a few ideas that could help you make a vacation with kids happen and not lose your mind in the process!

Look for opportunities!   Making vacations affordable is sometimes one of the biggest hurdles.  There are several different types of programs that can result in deep discounts or doable destinations, if you look ahead.  Do you use a credit card that accumulates points or miles?  Do you know your favorite destination special offer or sale time of year?  Does you or your spouse's employer offer any kind of special deal?  Even just asking around your family and friends to see if they have a time share condo or cabin somewhere that they might be willing to rent to you.  Mr. Butler is a civilian employee for the government which gives him access to a great travel office where they offer week-long condo stays around the country sometimes as cheap as $350.  We have found this to be a great option for our family because the kids get their own room, we usually have a washer and dryer on site, and a full kitchen makes eating in a breeze!

Separate Bedrooms - While typical hotels might feel like the cheaper option, we don't prefer it..  Being confined to one room with 3 kids under 8 wears on us after a while - especially when there is no yard to send them too for a while.  We have found the cheap condos to be a great option for our family because the kids get their own room and at least a back patio if not a yard area to play in.

Manage expectations - Don't let your self get sucked into an unrealistic vision of traveling with kids.  They need frequent snacks, bathroom breaks, plenty of rest and whatever else is their normal in every time zone.  If you start skipping naps or forgetting provisions, you may suffer for it.  Our favorite style of trip is where we can get to a trail within 30-40 minutes and go on a hike before or after lunch and then allowing everyone some down time before evening plans.  Whatever the natural rhythms of your family home are, try to recreate a version on your trip and keep wild expectations to a minimum  This helps to prevent meltdowns and keeps the kids on track too! ;)

Keep It Simple - It is so very tempting to try to make every trip on the level of Disney World, but it isn't necessary and in a lot of cases far more trouble than its worth.  With small children, anything that isn't home is instantly more exciting!  The miniature golf place down the road from where you are staying might be just like one at home, but since you are on a trip, it's magical!  The kids really enjoy visiting the local library where you can usually get a temporary card.  They are always excited for new books.  We try to take two trips a year, but at least one is usually very low-key with hiking being the main attraction.  National Parks are a great resource for trips like this.  Before you plan a theme park trip, just make sure it is practical for the age of your youngest child.  We expect to do a Disney World trip once the baby is 5 or 6 at least.  Just the walking alone is exhausting to adults and it can be a double burden with toddlers or those still needing a lot of care.   

Know Yourself - We've talked about what the kids need a lot, but also know what you need for something to feel like a vacation.  Being a sensitive introvert, I know I need pockets of downtime, preferably by myself.  On our latest trip to Arkansas, our condo had a small balcony with a table in chairs.  It turned out to be the perfect hideaway, especially if Mr. Butler took the kids somewhere for a while.  Whatever stresses you or wears on you, keep that in mind and don't include much of that.  Mr. Butler doesn't like excess or unnecessary clothes and luggage so we try to bring the minimum and depend on the washer and dryer that is usually on site.  Eating out a lot is hard on the budget and our health, which is a stress to both of us.  Another reason we choose the condos on our trips is the full kitchen.  With about 30 minutes of meal planning and making a grocery list, we are able to eat in for most of the trip, cutting down on expenses and sickness!

Clearly Defined Purpose - Don't forget why you took this trip in the first place.  For some, it will be about the location so seeing specific sights are important to get in.  Other trips are just about family time or feeling relaxed and rejuvenated.  Make sure how the pace and mood of your days reflects the purpose of your trip.

 
Above all else, find a way to take those trips together.  Like camping, it can seem like a huge waste of time the first time simply because its so much more work than you are used to.  But, trust me, it gets easier every time.  We have taken at least 4 trips since the Race Car (which means 3 kids in tow) was born and every time it got significantly easier.  It takes work, but the relationships you are building and the experiences you are having with your family are exceedingly worth it!

Baseball in the Morning

While I honestly I have no inkling about what this kid is going to do when he grows up, I do not hope or expect he will play professional sports.  However, he loves to play.  And I love that he loves it.  Ever since it has warmed up, he wants to be outside hitting balls.  There is something so pure about morning light and the clink of a bat and ball.  I have a lot of regrets and worries, but being able to give him space and opportunity to do this is a good good thing.

Why We Homeschool: An Ongoing Conversation

In our modern age of technology and instant information, the ability of the average family to homeschool is far greater than ever before. Regardless of a parent's current educational level or skill, there are mountains of books, forums and webinars teaching everything you could ever think of. In most areas - especially any kind of metropolitan area - there are all kinds of co-ops, activities, and support groups to facilitate anything you might be lacking. Plus, if your area truly is lacking a group of some kind, that's probably a sign that you need to start one! So, when Mr. Butler and I started discussing homeschool verses any kind of public/private school the thought that we couldn't just never came up really. It was more of a did we think it was best or was it what we/I wanted to do.

When it came down to it, all of the reasons we might choose something other than homeschooling (like the extra work I would put in and a harder time with housework) just didn't compare to all of the reasons we would (We decide the what/when/how in everything they are learning, we spend more time together as a family, and they are being influenced largely the way we choose).   As we have gone along, I've discovered other reasons that I didn't expect.  J (7) and miss Z (4) learn from each other all the time, but as they get older I'm seeing their individual strengths come into play.  The other day J and I were talking about multiplication and he was trying to remember something I had told him.  He's very smart and passionate, but also gets demotivated when things are 'too hard'.  Z has a gift for memorization.  If she hears something once it usually sticks and comes out later when you least expect it.  On this day, she started rattling off things about multiplication and before I know it, they are having a relatively sane and productive discussion explaining multiplication to each other.  Regardless of their ages, they are learning from each other.  That is so important for their emotional development as well as academic. 

He spontaneously started quizzing her on animals the other day.

The older they get, the needs and challenges will most certainly change.  If we homeschool and why we homeschool may change as well.  That's what is so hard to explain sometimes is that this road is a very fluid one that will likely not look like anyone else's and that's a good thing! 

Passionless Work: Why Bother?

She was finally settling down under the covers after much nagging on my part and lots of chattering on her part.  She smiled as her eyelids closed and said, "Goodnight, Mommy." The wind suddenly blew outside and a realization struck me.  My little girl - this larger than life free spirited girl who loves with her whole self and spreads excitement with her eyes - was tucked safely in her bed with nothing to fear and all her needs met.  So many others don't have that luxury, or worse, struggle under blankets of abuse.  I was so thankful for my girl's safety, but more than that I recognized how deeply indebted she is to her father who makes all of that possible.

I grew up championing passion and finding THE career or life calling that a person could get excited about.  Why do something for the rest of your life if you weren't passionate about it, right?   Well, I'm beginning to realize that passion is only half of the picture.  The nature of passion is that it burns hot at first, but can fade quickly.  The ability and willingness to work hard no matter what is something that you can depend on, finding passion and fulfillment in many places.  It is another case of emotion and truth having to work together for the best result.

Mr. Butler has wished many times that he had chosen a different career.  Engineering, while lucrative, is not what he thought it would be and not the most fulfilling thing he could be doing with his life.  I have told him so many times that I just wanted him to be happy with his work.  However, he is a fiercely committed man and has always sought to provide me - and eventually our babies - a safe and healthy environment in which to live and grow.  That has often involved work that might not have been his favorite but certainly took care of us.  For the longest time, I just didn't understand being okay with a job that you didn't just love.  I think the problem was that I didn't fully understand love at all.  Idealism and naivety can cloud your understanding.  Single parents,  two working parents, daycare, foster care, the list of not our first choices for a family situation is endless.  Life doesn't usually go the way you expect and then you find yourself making different choices.  Love for your family, more specifically love for your children changes the world as you know it and sheds a whole new light on eternity and God's provisions for us.

This man works hard, even on a Saturday morning when he'd rather take the day off.

Just as the way life goes, some things you just don't get until you're older and have been pushed around by life a little. All three of my little circus animals are safely tucked into their beds with full bellies, more clothes and toys than they need and have no fear of tomorrow.  With just a few different choices in life, that is quickly not the case.   My heart hurts for all of the innocent kids who didn't choose their lot, especially when it involves avoidable circumstances.  I still celebrate understanding ourselves and finding the career or hobby that makes your heart soar!  If you can get paid for what you love, that is a wonderful thing!  But more than that, keeping children safe (through a steady income or just being a good parent /advocate) and teaching them what love and security looks like is probably one of the most rewarding jobs someone could have.


So, to all of you who work hard and find yourself doing things that you don't exactly love in order to provide something for one of these little ones, THANK YOU!  What you are doing is changing the world for good.  And that's all anyone can hope for in this world, isn't it?

The Importance of Dad in the Homeschool

When you homeschool, sometimes it is really hard to resist the public school day comparison.  Even though I realize that not only are my children thriving but the entire reason we choose this way of life is to give them something different.  So, Mr. Butler (aka Daddy) is one of the ways we're making this homeschool thing work.  By nature, this guy is artistic, mechanical and creative (he's an engineer after all!) and with everything that is on my plate, it is easy for my energy to be empty when it comes to the major activities portion of the day.  All I have to do is ask and suddenly after dinner they are busy building tepees. 

I helped in between baby tending and kitchen cleaning, but the creative director was all Mr. Butler.  Both kids made their own little camp and were very proud of them. 

So, of course they couldn't stop there.  They combined their creations to make a little village, complete with planes, frogs, and Eeyore.

He also usually reads to the kids at bedtime and if there is anything I want him to read - from textbook to instruction manuals - he'll fit it in too.  Now that the little race car is almost 6 months old, I really feel compelled to have our new normal figured out.  Since I really don't (have it all figured out), I'm so thankful that Mr. Butler fills in the gaps with his strengths.  

With a baby in tow, a part-time job and no children over the age of 6, there is only so much finite control I can have over any given school day.  So praise the Lord for Daddy!

Rory the Race Car: A Birth Story

When miss Z turned a year old, I began having some health issues and eventually the need to wean her was discussed.  I didn't want to end that stage of parenting on such a difficult note.  At that point my anxiety was very high and the fear of not being able to have another child was very real.  I certainly didn't want to put me or a new child at risk, but in my heart I just wasn't finished with two.  There were a lot of prayers going up about this possible child #3 and from start to finish, everything was so. much. different.  From J to miss Z there were some clear differences, but I still felt like I was in the same ballpark.  Sickness, how I carried, emergencies, labor and delivery with this one were all almost foreign to me, they were so different! And for someone who really aches for familiarity (and panics at change and new things), this was hard to process.  Rory is over a month old and I'm just now sitting down to write about it - the shock of it all has made it hard to have any words I think.

As I've written before, miss Z's birth was so much more gentle and efficient than J's and I had attributed a lot of it to the self-hypnosis I had learned.  So obviously, I intended to do the same with the next one.  The trouble with that was that nothing lined up the same both mentally or physically.  I was looking to recreate miss Z's birth, but couldn't even muster up similar feelings when it came down to it.

On Saturday April 8, 2017 I woke up still very pregnant looking like this: 

I didn't feel good, but there were no regular contractions.  There was hardly any irregular contractions.  I felt poorly enough to ask my mom to work on (reflexology) my feet just to get things flowing in a good direction.  She did.  I felt better.  She left.  And I continued my day.  Mr. Butler was nesting for me - cleaning up the house like a pregnant woman.  I was cranky so I had a late lunch/snack and then took a shower.  

Showers always make me feel better.  This one made me feel worse.  It activated something and around 3:30 I started feeling sick in every direction.  That would make sense if I was in the middle of labor - that's called transition in case you're not familiar.  Transition is the point where most women reconsider and say "I can't do this."  The good news is that you're almost done at that point.  Well, I didn't know it at the time or even that it was possible, but I WAS in transition.  For some reason I just started there and skipped the build up.  Yay, right?  Well, sort of.  Because there were no rhythmic contractions, we weren't sure we should call the midwives or not.  Then I started having severe acute pelvic pain but still no contractions.  It was very uncomfortable and not getting easier.  So, Mr. Butler called and they were sending an assistant to check on me.  In the meantime, miss Z woke up from her nap and very concerned for me.  J was already with my dad so we sent her over there and my mom came over to help me.

After we had called, things started getting out of control.  I couldn't get comfortable, everything was VERY painful and I had to squat for any kind of relief. HELLO, that's transition getting ready to push!!!  But it just didn't make sense. None of it was in a familiar order or form.  When the guttural sounds started coming out of me spontaneously, I had Mr. Butler call back to confirm we were having a baby, regardless of how little sense it made!  Now, I tried to use my hypnosis.  I tried to relax and focus, but it was all for not.  Nothing I or anyone else did really helped.  The pain was constant and so intense that I had to focus on getting out of that situation as fast as possible.  So, that's what I did. 

The midwives' assistant arrived about 5:45 pm and had to start setting up for birth immediately as I was practically pushing.  She got everything set up just in time too because he was born at 6:01 pm before the senior midwife even made it!  The relief and joy was so amazing largely because the intensity of labor was insane!  But of course our little race car couldn't let the excitement end there.  When he came out he started turning blue and wouldn't sustain breathing.  He would cough and make a sound and then nothing.  So, the fantastic assistant knew just what to do and gave him oxygen and some chest compressions.  He was right next to me the whole time and perhaps it was all the love hormones flowing through me but I was confident he would be fine.  Mr. Butler and my mom seemed to be in charge of panicking instead.  Still, after a little bit of help he was breathing on his own and we were in business!

Rory Emerson was 10 lbs 2 oz and 22 in long. 

The big kids were VERY excited to meet him.

As many people know, we went on to have a hospital stay and some health concerns, but thanks to an enormous amount of prayer, he has been cleared of all issues and thriving at home!  We are learning many lessons through this sweet boy, but none so much as thankfulness for all the good things.  This mama's heart is very full.

Providing an Organic Home Environment

 Maybe it's part of my emotional and feeling nature but I love for things in my life to be as gradual and organic as possible.  The sudden change of plans and the brand new experiences - that life is stocked full of - are hard on my sensitive nervous system.  So, whenever I can I work hard to provide an environment that can naturally produce certain outcomes.  This act of self-preservation has provided some insight, especially in regards to my children and their development that I just LOVE!

It isn't rocket science or anything, but I think it bears notice in our cookie cutter world.  When you surround someone with certain things, there will be a response.  The nature and quality of things you surround them with will dictate the quality and nature of their response.  Hang out with complainers and you'll find yourself complaining and unhappy.  Work in a place with windows and a great view, you'll have a little better outlook on life.  When it comes to kids and education, there are so many factors that can influence for good or bad that it behooves us to incorporate as much good as we can squeeze in!  

No parent, relationship or educational journey is perfect and our family certainly has its weaknesses. Still, there are a few things that have had a really good effect on our family's development and education that I think are worth sharing. 

Music - Between my teaching piano lessons, 3 worship services a week worth of a capella singing, singing as a part of bedtime routine, and the perpetual playlist at our fingertips via Spotify and Pandora, music is part of everything we do.  Enhancing their musical involvement doesn't just boost their musical skills, but activates their brain development as a whole.  Google it. ;)

Nature - Being outside, having the freedom to move outside, gardening, hiking, climbing trees, seeing mountains and waterfalls - all of this is so good for your body and soul.  Besides the obvious vitamin D that is desperately needed for a healthy immune system, children are hard-wired to move and boxing them up for too long really does them a disservice.  The great outdoors help us balance out where we get stuck.  Can't focus? Go outside for a while.  Difficult relating to other people? Go outside for a while.  Whenever possible, there is always an outside element to whatever we are doing.  From school to vacation, we plan to go outside and probably get dirty!  That is definitely one of the perks of homeschooling.

Books - This might seem like a no-brainer to some, but I feel it is best when taken a step further.  My kids have been doubly blessed because they have access to books and also have parents (namely their father) who read and appreciate books themselves.  I have always loved to read, but it takes more diligence to fit it in these days.  Mr. Butler though, always has his head in a book or listening to something on his commute to work.  His relationship with books has nothing to do with the rest of us and speaks volumes to his kids.  So far, the kids both consume books like their daily meals - just can't get enough!  I know for some that reading a book for fun is like exercising for fun - it just doesn't compute.  Still, both are incredibly healthy examples to set for our families AND to keep our brains young and active!

Learning - This is an extension of the last one.  Mr. Butler is very abnormal (at least in my circles) in that he loves learning new things and loves to consume information.  The more data the better! Add that to home being the location of school and learning anyway, the kids are constantly surrounded by various aspects of learning.  When learning new things is a natural state of living, our brains, our relationships, even our moods can be enhanced.  Sometimes the DIY or how-to videos the kids beg to watch get annoying, but it is evidence of their love of learning (and their nerdy father!).  

Educating and raising kids is difficult at best.  My conservative nature loves to find ways to cushion my path and I guess building these life aspects into our routines so that they aren't even options most days helps me relax! Plus, now that J is really diving into school, I can see the benefits all around me! I love that!

Growing in Pictures

There's a song by Raffi that's called, "I Wonder If I'm Growing" that the kids sing a lot.  It highlights the common struggle to know when you're growing.  We don't usually feel it, but all of a sudden it is clear.  We haven't felt the growing, but this week we've sure seen evidence of it.

 The kids decided they wanted to have a pretend wedding instead of a show.  So, they picked out their wedding clothes themselves and laid blankets on the ground (for grass) and the cuteness ensued.  The conversations about flowers and music were hilarious.  Still, this was a first for the Butler household and it was evident how big they are getting.

J finished his first basketball season at the YMCA and I think soccer and baseball suit him better.  Still he seemed to have a great time.

J also got rid of his training wheels and took off like the wind.  Definite growth happening.

And last but not least, baby #3 is most certainly growing.  We'll be a party of 5 before we know it!

The Battle of the Wants

In our media driven society, being the right kind of mom is impossible.  Feed your kids the healthiest food, but don’t go overboard and be that mom who always asks about ingredients.  Don’t let your kids dictate your life, but make sure you listen every time they have something to say! It is such a struggle to find the right balance in these kinds of things, especially when you hear the debate on a loop over the loudspeaker in your head.  One of the biggest ones I go back and forth about is the wants.

“But I don’t want that!”  “Can I go – I WANT to go!”  “You never give me what I want!”

On the one hand, as parents we want our kids to be happy and associate their childhood (and us, of course) with mostly positive things.  I’m a piano teacher and I’m all too familiar with the stereotype of forced piano lessons for years that promises to build resentment and malaise for both the piano and the parents.  None of us want that kind of relationship for/with our children.  Yet, on the other hand, we simply do not always get what we want in life.  Success on any level takes work.  As kids, as adults, even as Americans, try as we might there are many realities far out of our control and always will be.  Expecting different sets us up for all kinds of failures and can often cause us to miss out on some truly magical times of growth and learning.

So, this is me. All. The. Time.  I honestly recognize there must be a balance and see the foolishness of letting the pendulum swing too far in either direction, but it can be really hard knowing when to disregard the “I don’t want to” and when to intentionally facilitate those desires.  It can be especially hard around the holidays because – whether you can financially accommodate it or not – one or both parents probably have a deep desire to see their family happy and excited, whether about gifts or outings of some kind.  How often do we stretch that budget farther than it should go for some excitement factor only to regret it when the bills come in January?

When we get stuck on the wanting fence, we must first set our boundaries and life values.  Of course, let the moral values preside, but after those are clear, look at budgets, time, and relationships.  A want shouldn’t outweigh some of these things without a greater reason than just because I want to. Sometimes no is inevitable once we’ve considered how much it costs or requires of us.  When the moral or truly limiting issues are ruled out, a person’s individual needs or goals need to be considered.  When a child is saving money for a larger toy or could help out a friend, but is suddenly drowning in the temptation of the now, it’s the perfect opportunity for a hard life lesson.  Choosing not to facilitate both options for them equips them for the choices adults have to make daily. 

Just like the media’s perfect parent is something of a Bigfoot, making the ‘right’ choice may not exist most days.  The good news is that in wrestling with these choices we end up fulfilling the wants that matter more anyway.

The Beginner's Bible: A Zonderkidz Review

One of the most important parenting tasks Mr. Butler and I have is to teach our children the Bible and start out their lives with the habit of consuming it daily.  While I know that the word of God is so powerful, if it isn't in the stores of my mind and made available to use when needed, it can be made ineffective, to say the least.  As many of us are diving into reading the Bible (or parts of it) in a year, why not encourage our kids to do the same!  Our kids need these habits set in place as soon as possible for maximum benefit!  Last month, as part of the Homeschool Review Crew, we received The Beginner's Bible from Zonderkidz to review and it has certainly supported the family goal of studying the Bible more regularly.  Since J was born we have been exposed to a few different kinds of children's Bibles, but I had never taken a look at any version of this one.  It widened my children's Bibles experience!

This hardback book includes over 90 Bible stories that my 6 year old was able to read just fine, but comprehensive enough to read aloud with everyone. My husband started including it in the kids nightly reading time and noted with disappointment that the story of Cain and Abel was not included. Biblical accuracy is really important in our household, but as we explored the book further we were surprised to see instances of baptism and Paul's missionary journeys were included in the New Testament that often are omitted.. So, you can't have everything, but there were some nice details included.  Though it has been around for a while, the Beginner's Bible has recently been updated with new 3D artwork and some great resources to complement the book's use.  At first, I just gave the book to J to read during quiet time and he seem to take ownership of it pretty quickly.  Later, while exploring the website, I discovered a wealth of activities that accentuated the Bible study perfectly and for a range of ages!  Whether you have a large classroom setting or just trying to enrich your kid's Bible involvement, there is probably a resource for you.  On the website you have access to the following:

• coloring sheets (using artwork straight from the Bible)
• word searches 
• mazes 
• trivia cards 
• placemats 
• sticker sheets
• posters
• snack ideas
• reading suggestions
• games (paint, puzzles, matching, etc.)
• videos
• bookmarks
• and even more!

With all of the resources that Zonderkids has provided, you could easily develop a Bible curriculum for your students - for the year, for a few months or whatever your needs are!  Adults and kids alike, the most important foundation for a relationship with God is knowing what He teaches.  In my experience, one of the best ways to learn is to receive information and reinforcement from multiple directions and this resource website makes learning about the Bible almost as easy as osmosis with the variety of options available!  All in all, we found this Beginner's Bible to be a great place to start your kids

If you have younger kids or have different needs, Zonderkidz also sells a version for little ones, a deluxe version (that includes audible CDs) and a collector's edition.

Keep up with Zonderkidz on Social Media:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Zonderkidz/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/zonderkidz

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/zondervan

Pinterest: https://pinterest.com/zondervanp/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/zondervan/

Know Your Child Today

One of the most fun things to do with a newborn baby is to see who he looks like.  From the very start, we look at these beautiful children with comparing eyes ready to categorize them in some way.  From your dad’s eyes to your brother’s pouty lip, we look for the familiar, don’t we?  Those familiar traits instinctively draw out deeper love and connection!   As that child grows, the categorizing continues into realms of behavior, attitudes, and temperament.  This cataloging is one of the reasons parents should be considered the expert on their child.   We are seeing it all and constantly studying to further know and connect with our children.  One of the advantages of homeschooling and being your kids’ primary instructor is an even greater knowledge of our children’s skills and limitations.  But have you looked intently at who your child is with a mind open to seeing changes or misconceptions? Are you focusing on understanding them as much as you are their academic record?  While we may be experts, infallible we are not. 

I have known a few families where one child goes astray in one way or another and a common denominator is always the lack of understanding or acknowledgement in this child’s differences.  Often the parents treated the child as though they were (or should be) just like them (commonly the same gender parent).  To a misunderstood and immature mind, when core personality traits aren’t understood, all the parents’ instruction and guidance can come into question.  Truly knowing and acknowledging our children – especially when they are not like us in some significant ways – is critical to fully equipping them to succeed and glorify God with their life.

My mother is a very extroverted (gets energy from people) person while my father is introverted (gets energy from being alone).  No one ever said I should feel a certain way other than obeying God, but somewhere I got in my head that since my mother is a girl then I would be like her because I am a girl.  Turns out I’m very introverted - like my dad - but spent the first 20 years of my life not really knowing the difference and pushing myself to lengths that just made me sick and miserable.  I’m 36 and still struggle with the compulsion to be a people person, but physically just can’t keep up.  This wasn’t some grand neglect on the part of my parents but more of a lack of vocabulary on the subject.   We now have mainstream tools like love languages, temperaments, and color codes to better understand each other, as long as we pay attention.  In knowing our children, we’re really talking about blind spots.  Parents don’t set out to ignore or misunderstand their children.  In some cases, children don’t ever communicate feelings of disconnect or difference until there’s already a major problem.  It’s asking the questions you think you already know the answers to and being willing to shift gears when you’re surprised at the responses.  It’s about being faithful to revisit who your children are today.

This content was originally published at  Homeschooling with Heart, The Old Schoolhouse Blog.