Your Problem Isn't Really Your Problem

Happy July to you! Here in Oklahoma, we've been given a marvelous gift of highs in the 80's all week.  After the extreme weather we've been battling, it's definitely a show of God's mercy and goodness.

I am currently 39+ weeks pregnant and playing the waiting game with the arrival of baby #2.  With this pregnancy going a lot smoother with very little 'misery' and everything appearing to ready and healthy,  there is much to rejoice about.

Since Mr. Butler has finished his first year (of 2) of MBA school and I've taken some time off from teaching, we're enjoying much needed time together as a family and catching up on the back log of to-do's around the house.  After the very full year we've had, this break is such a blessing!

And yet.

And yet, I still find myself focusing on what I feel like I'm lacking.  Since this baby could come any time now, I can't travel and I need to rest a lot.  Kind of lame when it's the season for activity and fun! Do you ever think like that?  My life is full of things that you might envy, but all I can think about is what I can't do and don't have.  Any new day, regardless of the actual events, can be a struggle - a battle between positive and negative.

Why Your Problem Isn't Your Real Problem

What that tells me today is that it just doesn't matter what your circumstance is or how much money you have.  The problems we focus on usually just aren't the real problem. You can be grateful and joyful about what you do have or you can always complain about what's missing.  It won't matter if today's problem was fixed, we could just find something else to fixate on and be miserable about.  The real problem is our response - a tone of voice, the amount of faith or hope, effort and attitude.

When I'm miserable, being told to CHOOSE to be content despite the circumstance is not that helpful.  Why?  Because I want my emotions to change on the subject before my response does.  Did you get that? We are usually waiting on our emotions to change before we change our response.  Unfortunately, it doesn't work very well that way.

Instead, I need to be focusing on the best response with the expectations that my feelings will change.  So, what's a good response? Gratitude.  What are you grateful for?  What prayer has been answered that was such a burden before?  What are you learning right now? Behave - respond - as though it is a blessing!

"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:17

The Balance We Bring

You know the bad mood you get sometimes that can take everything about anything and turn it into something bad?  Especially the one that's focused on yourself and how horrendous or UN-special you are?  I lived there for a few decades and still have 'nostalgic' moments from time to time.  I think it began with the realization that I had blond hair, but no other member of my immediate family did.  Suddenly, I thought surely I was adopted, weird and singled out (in a bad way) because I didn't have black or brown hair.  Nevermind that the masses preferred blond hair and I should've considered my self blessed!  Goofy, of course, but that's how irrational fears and uncertainties work.

I think we all can write a list of attributes that we hate and would trade with someone, if given the chance.  Truth be told is that most of those hated aspects are probably bringing balance to one of your communities and several relationships.  What we experience as weird or different is often an opportunity to help others find an equilibrium somehow.

Though the little can complain of not knowing how, the big's heart grows bigger in the showing how.

-You might hate the grammar police, but they're a great resource when you need that resume proofread.

-Maybe you can't stand that 'soandso' is always late, but they remind you to grow in mercy and patience.  Or maybe you bristle up at the 15 minutes early crowd.  They are usually the ones who provide extra help and preparation.

-Spenders help us remember that life is short and to enjoy our days.  Savers prepare for our future and give many good gifts in time.  Both are necessary for a healthy life.

We can grow so overwhelmed by disgust - for ourself or someone else - that we completely miss value and balance that everyone brings.  I struggle a lot with not focusing on all of my ugly attributes (inside and out).  It's hard when I'm looking to be this perfect person that everyone loves, that I love and that is never wrong, but all I come up with is me.  What I overlook, though, is how much value even my ugly faults can bring the world around me.

Confessing a weakness to a friend usually increases your bond.  Asking for help gives others an opportunity to serve.  Even experiencing sickness or tragedy can bring others closer to God through prayer.  We all bring balance to others, if only we would look up and appreciate it.

Politics, Sports and Other Things I Care Very Little For

It's Thursday and here's what's going on: The kick-off of football season, two political conventions just about in the books, and even with the holiday on Monday, I feel like I haven't seen my husband all week!  I'm not a sports fan.  I'm certainly not a political activist.  And I get cranky when my routine gets messed up!  So, maybe I'm a little cranky, but I have a couple of opinions about some of the hypocrisy we allow when sports and politics are involved.

I'll just tell you up front, every time the subject (whether in person or in social media) of politics or sports comes up, I cringe.  I cringe and I pray people will behave.  Because about 70% of the time, people don't behave.  People aren't respectful, humble, kind or honest.  We get prideful, boasting, rude, mean and grow into big fat liars.  Liars to ourselves about how good our team/political party is and how bad the other is.  Liars to each other, making claims about what (or who) will fix things in the country/conference/team.  We also get demanding and ungrateful.  The ability to vote in an election and watch a football game on a beautiful Saturday alike are awesome gifts and blessings.  Many times, we behave as though we are in charge of everything to do with them and are personally paying each politician and player.

Now, living in Oklahoma, you can't get away from sports fans because these days, if it's not football it's basketball.  And I also live in a free, relatively democratic society so getting away from others exercising their political freedoms would mean moving and potentially giving up my own freedoms.  So, I am in no way suggesting that we try to get away or that all involvement and support of sports and politics is bad, wrong or offensive to me.  I love a good basketball or football game, snuggled up to Mr. Butler - especially with my ipod handy to distract me when I lose interest! I know one day J will be on some field or court and I'll desperately pray to God that his team win!  And, I get fearful and overwhelmed at the thought of one day losing my freedoms - freedom of religion, the safety and luxuries we are provided in this country! I'm even thankful there are at least two major political parties, where one party or ideal can't dominate completely for ever and ever.

What I am begging for is good, well-thought out, reasonable behavior.  Just because a party did something profitable once doesn't mean it is infallible and is the only solution to everything.  But just because you disagree with certain ideals of a party doesn't mean it can't accomplish beneficial things for everyone.  Politically, I'm probably half republican and half democrat because I support some of both sides.  In sports and politics, every last player and coach are human, subject to mistakes, circumstances and game-changing events.  Everybody has a bad day and deserves mercy just as much as you do.  If you can't enjoy the ride and appreciate the process without being rude and stirring up strife with others then maybe you should re-evaluate why you feel so strongly that you can't behave in an honorable way.  And yes, I may feel so strongly about all of this because I'm cranky, so maybe we'll all behave better next week! :)

It's a balance, I tell ya!

Know The Reason

The other day the chorus to popular christian song, "Blessed Be Your Name" got stuck in my head, playing over and over.  And I started thinking about why is 'your name blessed'.  There are things that we do and say sometimes that we don't really understand the full meaning of, but we should.  As a kid, maybe I hear that song sung, but do I hear someone telling me why the Lord's name is blessed?

Today I thought I'd share just a few reasons why that song is true for me.

Every day I am blessed with an opportunity to start over fresh!

Just when I think things couldn't be worse, my eyes are opened to the lesson I'm being taught.

No matter what my mouth can find to complain about, it's all under either my control or God's. (So I need to either do something about it or leave it to God!)

Despite my many shameful regrets, He gives good gifts every day.  My most favorite of all, a growing boy that doesn't mind smiling!

The old adage that says to count your blessings is saying to do more than just count. Know the reasons life is good and praises need to be sung!