Monday, August 2, 2010

Emotional Control

This week I'm looking for feedback, if you have any.  I have just over 3 months left before my life changes forever and there are some things that need to be addressed in my life. Besides benefiting my relationships with everyone, its just not an attribute I want my kids to learn from me.  So, this week the topic of controlling one's emotions will be the focus.

Like a lot of things, if this control is learned early on as a child, its not really thought about much as an adult because it is automatic most of the time.  In my case, I never learned it (or it never stuck) to the degree that I'd like.  For a while, I attempted to fix the issue by trying to ensure ideal circumstances.  Since I'm more emotional when I haven't gotten enough sleep, eaten well, or kept my stress to a minimum, it makes sense that ensuring I get all of those things would ensure emotional control, right? In theory, yes.  But, as we all know, no matter how hard we try to control our little world, there always comes moments and days of chaos that we could never have planned for.  So, what then?



It is easy to maintain control when there is order and peace.  It is the moments of sudden, unexpected hurts combined with others' high emotions and a broken appliance or freak accident thrown into the mix that emotional control can feel like an impossibility.  Those of you who excel at keeping a cool head in the middle of all this, how do you do it?  Aside from the obvious "That's how my parent was" or "I don't know. Freaking out just didn't seem to be helpful", are there specific choices or thoughts that help you re-direct unhelpful, rash emotions?

The ability to experience feel emotions deeply can be a beautiful thing.  Those without it miss out on amazing things in the world.  So, to be clear, I don't view emotions as something to be stamped out, but they can be a hazard in someone who hasn't learned how to control them adequately (me!).  Thoughts?

2 comments:

Laura said...

Hmmm...I'm not really sure. I usually just have a long looking perspective. I'm fairly even tempered in general, but even when mad can usually hold it in till I'm by myself. I rage and storm and call my mom to do more then, but only when it's safe and won't have longer term consequences. It's just not worth it. I don't quite know how that would help with children though...

Amy Butler said...

That's probably where I get hung up. I've had bad experiences when I hold it in and then bad experiences when I let it out! :) So not seeing the line clearly, I end up giving up and letting go altogether.

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