Friday, November 25, 2016

Marriage and the Tower of Babel

Marriage can be so hard.  J was recently studying the tower of Babel for school and it just reminded me so much of marriage some days.  Being in sync with your spouse is almost a magical feeling.  You're on the same page and headed in the same direction - such an enormous blessing for everyone involved, especially the kiddos.  But there are times when it is as if you've been struck like the people building the tower were and no matter what you try to communicate, it just seems to come out as gibberish to the other.  It can just be so hard.  Don't let that be discouraging if you hope to get married some day, but just make sure your expectations are realistic.  Even in your best hard reality flick, you don't see how much work has to go into every relationship that is worth its salt.  See those smiles down there?  They are real, but not long after the picture was taken the wind picked up and sand was flying everywhere.  I freaked out and thought he was crazy for wanting to stay any longer.  He LOVES adventure and I panic at new things.  Marriage can be really complicated.

Earlier this week, Mr. Butler and I found ourselves continuing to argue about things.  Arguments aren't unusual (we're polar opposites in so many ways) but not seeming to ever get resolved wasn't our norm.  After multiple attempts, the resolution was only achieved after realizing our entire issue was based on the different ways we were communicating things.  Don't you hate when that happens? :)  Sometimes we get into ruts where we just expect the person we're arguing with to be against us and not good-willed when really the language has gotten lost in translation somewhere.

It's December now and no matter who you are and what your life choices are, this will be one of your busiest and potentially most stressful months of the year.  Let's work on our language (and I'm not exactly talking about bad words) and bridging the gap between our frustrations and the appreciation we want others to feel.  It's easy to attack others for what we think they think about us, but simplifying our communication might just clear everything up and help us feel a whole lot better.

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