Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Be Just Like Me!

I'm not sure what it is about us humans that makes us desire, expect, demand others be, think, want just like us.  Perhaps its partly female but I expect its largely human.  We seem surprised when others like different things than we do.  Sometimes we are even offended that others make decisions vastly different than we do.  More often than not, we try (at least internally if not outright) to make others be like us.

 A good example is love - getting married - having a spouse.  It is common to hand out unsolicited advice to engaged/newlywed couples like it's candy.  "Oh, I know you feel that way now, but just you wait! It's all going to change and be [insert my personal experience here]"  Now, maybe they'll have your experience and maybe they won't.  But why is it so easy to walk around telling people they WILL be just like us, when #1 we don't really know and #2 we usually hate to be told how our life is going to be just as much as the next guy?

I've been on both ends of this scenario and didn't like how it felt either way.  It's one thing to be told that you're normal, but it's a whole different ball game to be told you don't know your life at all.  I'm guilty of it I know and if I did it to you, I'm sorry.  And I'm not criticizing advice from those with more experience.  It's the unsolicited "I know better than you about your own life" kind of stuff that doesn't seem to benefit anyone.  There are a few things in the world that a lot of us would agree on for sure (God, murder isn't a good idea, etc.), but the rest is pretty subjective.  Some girls, okay A LOT of girls love princessdressuppinkshoppingbarbiegirlygirlmakeupfashionista-NESS.  I despise it.  I really hope God blesses me with many boys, though by that very desire I'm fully aware it's likely I'll have a coop full of hens.  But the point is I'm very different from a lot of people that way.  Actually there is a whole lot of me that is very different than most people. So, you'd think I would be used to being different and not ever get caught up in trying to make others just like me somehow.  Why is it so hard (myself included) to believe, accept and celebrate the differences in other people?

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